A Christmas Carol

Discussion in 'THE AIGBURTH ARMS' started by Nikki the Great, Dec 21, 2017.

  1. Nikki the Great

    Nikki the Great Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Omg!!! Yay!!!!
    This is Lee/Flea.
     
  2. Abe

    Abe Deck Sergeant

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    LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
     
  3. Cloud

    Cloud Flight Co-Ordinator

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    I am a big fan of this Christmas Carol. Nikki is obviously a literary genius
     
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  4. Nikki the Great

    Nikki the Great Flight Co-Ordinator

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    I am Charles Nikkens!
     
  5. Asclepius

    Asclepius Deck Sergeant

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    I hope there will be printed version soon. I'm buying 12 books, please.
     
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  6. Nikki the Great

    Nikki the Great Flight Co-Ordinator

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    The Phantom slowly, gravely, silently approached. When it came, @Bluey bent down upon his knee; for in the very air through which this Spirit moved it seemed to scatter doom and mystery.

    It was shrouded in a deep black garment, which concealed its head, its face, its form, and left nothing of it visible save one outstretched hand. But for this it would have been difficult to detach its figure from the night, and separate it from the darkness by which it was surrounded.

    He felt that it was tall and stately when it came beside him, and that its mysterious presence filled him with a solemn dread. He knew no more, for the Spirit neither spoke nor moved.

    `I am in the presence of the Professor of the Future.' said @Bluey.

    The Professor answered not, but pointed onward with its hand.

    `You are about to show me shadows of the things that have not happened, but will happen in the time before us,' @Bluey pursued. `Is that so, Prof.'

    The upper portion of the garment was contracted for an instant in its folds, as if the Spirit had inclined its head. 'ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR' That was the only answer he received.
     
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  7. Kittypaws

    Kittypaws Flight Co-Ordinator

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  8. Nikki the Great

    Nikki the Great Flight Co-Ordinator

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    The Professor moved away as it had come towards him. @Bluey followed, being nosy.

    The Professor stopped beside one little knot of people minding their own business. @Bluey advanced to listen to their talk, being more nosy.

    ' I don't know much about it, either way. I only know he's left the forum.' said a woman dressed as a cat.

    `When did he leave.' inquired another woman, sat upon a lawnmower.

    `Last night, I believe.' replied a third woman, holding an annual pool pass in her hand.

    `Why, what was the matter with him?' asked some sort of Gollum creature, taking a vast quantity of guff out of a very large guff-box and sniffing it. `I thought he'd never leave.'

    `God knows,' said a small Ant and Dec-ish man, with a yawn.

    `What has he done with his binoculars.' asked an angry-faced gentleman with a very long name.

    `I haven't heard,' said a man who had a strange smell coming from his hat `Left them to Mavis, perhaps. He hasn't left them to me. That's all I know.'

    This pleasantry was received with a general laugh.

    Speakers and listeners strolled away, and mixed with other groups. @Bluey knew the people, and looked towards the Professor for an explanation.

    The Professor glided on into a street. Its finger pointed to two persons meeting. @Bluey listened again, thinking that the explanation might lie here. And just generally being nosy of course.

    He knew these men, also, perfectly. They were men of his team of B's.

    `How are you.' said @BadOleSantabot.

    `Busy being cross. You?' returned Billy salt

    `Well.' said @BadOleSantabot . `Old @Bluey has left the forum at last, hey.'

    `So I am told,' returned Billy, scowling. `Cold, isn't it.'

    `Seasonable for Christmas time. You're not a skater, I suppose.'

    `No. No. Something else to think of. And I hate thinking of things. And people. And everything.'

    Not another word. That was their meeting, their conversation, and their parting.

    The Professor and @Bluey left this scene, and went into an obscure part of the town, where @Bluey had never penetrated before, although he recognised its situation, and its bad repute. The ways were foul and narrow; the shops and houses wretched; the people half-naked, drunken, slipshod, ugly. Alleys and archways and discarded hats, like so many cesspools, disgorged their offences of smell, and dirt, and life, upon the straggling streets; and the whole quarter reeked with crime, with filth, and orgies. This was clearly the place known only as Chat.

    In this den of infamous resort, there was a man who may have resembled a beardy pirate, if he actually had a beard, which he didn't.

    @Bluey and the Professor came into the presence of this man, just as a woman surrounded by a male harem slunk into the place.

    @Saint Nikki sat down in a flaunting manner on a stool; crossing her elbows on her knees, and looking with a bold defiance at everyone else in the place.

    'Look what I've got, @Snow Cloud,' said @Saint Nikki .

    @Snow Cloud went down on his knees for reasons that can't quite be explained, and having unfastened a great many knots, dragged out a load of cans.

    `What do you call this.' said @Snow Cloud. `Bepis.'

    `Ah.' returned @Saint Nikki, laughing and leaning forward on her crossed arms. `Bepis.'

    `You don't mean to say you took them out of his fridge, with him lying there.' said @Snow Cloud.

    `Yes I do,' replied @Saint Nikki. `Why not.'

    `We are terrible,' said @Snow Cloud,'

    @Bluey listened to this dialogue in horror.

    `Hahahaha.' laughed @Saint Nikki, producing a bag with binoculars in it, 'Sightmobiles hahahahahaha'

    `Professor.' said @Bluey, shuddering from head to foot. `Merciful Heaven, what is this.'
     
    Last edited: Dec 29, 2017
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  9. Asclepius

    Asclepius Deck Sergeant

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    This really deserves Nobel prize for literature, but it has one tiby problem: Why am I not in?
     
  10. Nikki the Great

    Nikki the Great Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Give it time Smurfy, you may make an appearance yet!
     
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  11. Kittypaws

    Kittypaws Flight Co-Ordinator

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  12. BigOleDummy

    BigOleDummy Console Officer

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    Well, my part, though small indeed, was/is incredibly profound.
     
  13. Ant E

    Ant E Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Ugh... billy, Bluey and BigOleDummy. What a ghastly combination!
     
  14. BigOleDummy

    BigOleDummy Console Officer

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    Umm ..... shouldn't that be Bluey, BigOleDummy and THEN Billy?
     
  15. Ant E

    Ant E Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Nope
     
  16. BigOleDummy

    BigOleDummy Console Officer

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    :wave::wave::wave:
    Are you SURE?
     
  17. Cloud

    Cloud Flight Co-Ordinator

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    I like this cause I was in it and it was a realistic portrayal of us. Tis a literary masterpiece
     
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  18. Asclepius

    Asclepius Deck Sergeant

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    This made me very very happy. Thanks, Charles.:thanks:
     
  19. Kittypaws

    Kittypaws Flight Co-Ordinator

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    This is brilliant!
     
  20. Nikki the Great

    Nikki the Great Flight Co-Ordinator

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    @Bluey recoiled in terror, for the scene had changed, and now he was looking at a profile page: a bare profile page. The screen was very dark, too dark to be observed with any accuracy, though @Bluey glanced round it in obedience to a secret impulse, anxious to know what kind of profile it was. A pale light, rising in the outer air, fell straight upon the screen of the pc; and on it, plundered and bereft, unwatched, unwept, uncared for, was the profile page of this man.

    @Bluey glanced towards the Professor. Its steady hand was pointed to the avatar. The motion of a finger upon a mouse would have disclosed the image. He thought of it, felt how easy it would be to do, and longed to do it; but had no more power to withdraw click it than to dismiss the Professor at his side.

    `Professor.' he said,' this is a fearful place. In leaving it, I shall not leave its lesson, trust me. Let us go.'

    Still the Professor pointed with an unmoved finger to the avatar.

    `I understand you,' @Bluey returned,' and I would do it, if I could. But I have not the time, Prof. I have not the time.'

    Again it seemed to look upon him.

    `If there is any person on the forum, who feels emotion caused by this man's departure from the forum,' said @Bluey quite agonised, `show that person to me, Prof, I beseech you.'

    The Professor spread its dark robe before him for a moment, like a wing; and withdrawing it, revealed a room by daylight, where some people were. It was @Decembers Crotchit's house; the dwelling he had visited before.

    Quiet. Very quiet. The noisy little euphonium players - @Abe but more Christmassy and all and @Wenceslas - were as still as statues in one corner, looking at some spoons.

    @Abe but more Christmassy and all put his hand up to his face.

    `The cutlery hurts my eyes,' he said.

    `They're better now again,' said @Abe but more Christmassy and all. `It makes them weak by pc monitor light; and I wouldn't show weak eyes to @Decembers when he comes home, for the world. It must be near his time.'

    `Past it rather,' @Wenceslas answered, shutting up his spoon book. `But I think he has walked a little slower than he used, these few last evenings.'

    They were very quiet again. At last @Abe but more Christmassy and all said, and in a steady, cheerful voice, that only faltered once:

    `I have known him walk with -- I have known him walk with his enormous willbert slung over his shoulder, very fast indeed.'

    `And so have I,' cried @Wenceslas. `Often.'

    `But it was very satisfying to carry,' @Abe but more Christmassy and all resumed, ' and @Decembers loved it so, that it was no trouble: no trouble. And there is @Decembers at the door.'

    @Decembers was very cheerful with them, and spoke pleasantly. He looked at the spoons upon the table. He broke down all at once. He couldn't help it.

    'My huge, huge willy.' cried @Decembers. `My huge willy.'

    `Prof,' said @Bluey,' this does not interest me. Tell me what profile that was whom we saw just now.'

    Indeed, the Professor of the Future did not stay for anything, but went straight on, as to the end just now desired, until besought by @Bluey to tarry for a moment.

    `This courts,' said @Bluey,' through which we hurry now, is where my place of occupation is, and has been for a length of time. I see the forum. Let me behold what I shall be, in days to come.'

    A list of inactive forum accounts. Here, then, the wretched man whose name he had now to learn.

    The Professor pointed down to One. @Bluey peered at it grumbling.

    `Before I draw look at that profile to which you point,' said @Bluey, `answer me one question. Are these the shadows of the things that Will be, or are they shadows of things that May be, only.'

    Still the Professor pointed to the screen.

    @Bluey, following the finger, read upon the screen of the neglected profile his own name, @Bluey.

    `Professor.' he cried, tight clutching at its robe,' hear me. I am not the man I was. I will not be the man I must have been but for this intercourse. Why show me this, if I am past all hope.'

    For the first time the hand appeared to shake.

    `Good Professor,' he pursued, ' Your nature intercedes for me, and pities me. Assure me that I yet may change these shadows you have shown me, by an altered life.'

    The kind hand trembled.

    `I will honour the forum in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will post some threads. The Spirits of all Three B's shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach. Oh, tell me I may sponge away the writing on this screen.'

    In his agony, he caught the Professor's hand. It sought to free itself, but he was strong in his entreaty, and detained it. The Professor, stronger yet, repulsed him.

    'ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR ERROR' said the Professor of the Future, before it shrunk, collapsed, and dwindled down into a bedpost.
     

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