Red Dwarf haikus

Discussion in 'RED DWARF UNIVERSE' started by R.I.P. 2000, Feb 19, 2017.

  1. R.I.P. 2000

    R.I.P. 2000 Deck Sergeant

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    Here's a witty parlour game! Write a Haiku synopsis of an episode. I've done three to get the ball rolling:

    THE END

    Disaster in space!
    Lone survivor wakes from sleep
    But isn't alone.

    FUTURE ECHOES

    Future imperfect?
    Visions of disaster seen
    On breaking light-speed.

    BALANCE OF POWER

    A battle of wills:
    One man trains to be a chef
    And stirs up trouble.

    We're going for the simplified convention where a Haiku is five/seven/five syllables.
     
  2. Dismembers

    Dismembers Deck Sergeant

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    The Inquisitor

    Justification
    That is what he seeks of you
    Some passed, not those two.
     
  3. R.I.P. 2000

    R.I.P. 2000 Deck Sergeant

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    Superb, Pembers!!!
     
  4. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Hey I like the challenge :-)

    Let's have a little think.... in me head... :idea:
     
  5. Dismembers

    Dismembers Deck Sergeant

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    DNA

    A wish now come true
    A new runner joins our race
    Sent soon, back in place.
     
  6. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    The Beginning

    Hogey seeking fun,
    Simulants aim to destroy,
    Rimmer saves the day.
     
  7. R.I.P. 2000

    R.I.P. 2000 Deck Sergeant

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    Brilliant!!

    Waiting for God

    "It's a garbage pod!
    It's a smegging *garbage* pod!"

    Losing religion.

    Confidence and Paranoia

    Astronaut fever
    Made charisma come alive
    And murder self-doubt.
     
  8. Callisto252

    Callisto252 Supply Officer

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    Well mine aren't particularly poetic, but anyway...

    Demons and Angels
    Triplicator fail
    Two Red Dwarfs, one good, one bad
    Yikes, evil smeggers!!

    Quarantine
    Arn gets holo-plague
    Goes Flibble-ing doolally
    Till rescued by luck

    Holoship
    A ship made of light
    Rimmer attains Nirvana(h)
    And learns how to love

    25 years since series V today! (and a quarter of a century of loving the small rouge one for me :-) )
     
  9. R.I.P. 2000

    R.I.P. 2000 Deck Sergeant

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    MeĀ²

    A self-loathing man
    Coming face-to-face with his
    Own worst enemy.
     
  10. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Back to Reality

    Game over, Dwarfers,
    Go back to reality,
    But is it true life?
     
  11. R.I.P. 2000

    R.I.P. 2000 Deck Sergeant

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    Kryten

    Do androids dream of
    Electric sheets, or rebels
    With CPU cores?
     
  12. Zombie Smurf

    Zombie Smurf Supply Officer

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    Behind you
    Entangled
    Moon with life signs.
    Tragical game.
    But problems just starts...
     
  13. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    The Last Day

    Silicon heaven,
    Where all calculators go,
    Hudzen loses faith.
     
  14. Kittypaws

    Kittypaws Flight Co-Ordinator

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    On gawd, I'm useless at haikus... :shock:
     
  15. Zombie Smurf

    Zombie Smurf Supply Officer

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    Behind you
    Back to Earth

    Russian girl created portal.
    It takes us back to Earth,
    but we aren't real...
     
  16. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Never mind, so is Asclepius ;-)

    But he makes good efforts :-)
     
  17. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Give & Take
    Derelict station
    A time-travel paradox
    Whose kidney was it?
     
  18. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Officer Rimmer
    Synthetic captain
    Rimmer clones himself again
    Will he ever learn?
     
  19. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Psirens
    Lister thinks he is
    Kissing Pete Tranter's sister
    But it's a Psiren
     
  20. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Out of Time
    Found a time-machine
    But it's not a space-machine
    Renaissance deep-space

    Tikka to Ride
    It's a space-drive now
    Set to Dallas '63
    Didn't they check it?

    Entangled
    Those rods from Trojan
    Crop up again in this one
    Haven't seen them since

    Lemons
    Back-to-Earth machine
    Rejuvination shower
    Stick it on the pile

    Marooned
    Lister and Rimmer
    Trapped in a room together
    Just like the old days

    Terrorform
    Inside Rimmer's mind
    His neuroses come to life
    Tell him you love him

    Balance of Power
    Holo-Kochanski
    Has "A woman's period"
    It's Rimmer in there!

    Dear Dave
    A post-pod arrives
    Lister's ex-girlfriend Hayley
    Pregnant in the past

    Fathers & Suns
    Father's Day in space
    Lister gives himself a card
    Since he's his own dad
     

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