Red Dwarf haikus

Discussion in 'RED DWARF UNIVERSE' started by HO HO HO I'M JMC, Feb 19, 2017.

  1. HO HO HO I'M JMC

    HO HO HO I'M JMC Deck Sergeant

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    Here's a witty parlour game! Write a Haiku synopsis of an episode. I've done three to get the ball rolling:

    THE END

    Disaster in space!
    Lone survivor wakes from sleep
    But isn't alone.

    FUTURE ECHOES

    Future imperfect?
    Visions of disaster seen
    On breaking light-speed.

    BALANCE OF POWER

    A battle of wills:
    One man trains to be a chef
    And stirs up trouble.

    We're going for the simplified convention where a Haiku is five/seven/five syllables.
     
  2. Decembers

    Decembers Deck Sergeant

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    The Inquisitor

    Justification
    That is what he seeks of you
    Some passed, not those two.
     
  3. HO HO HO I'M JMC

    HO HO HO I'M JMC Deck Sergeant

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    Superb, Pembers!!!
     
  4. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Hey I like the challenge :-)

    Let's have a little think.... in me head... :idea:
     
  5. Decembers

    Decembers Deck Sergeant

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    DNA

    A wish now come true
    A new runner joins our race
    Sent soon, back in place.
     
  6. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    The Beginning

    Hogey seeking fun,
    Simulants aim to destroy,
    Rimmer saves the day.
     
  7. HO HO HO I'M JMC

    HO HO HO I'M JMC Deck Sergeant

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    Brilliant!!

    Waiting for God

    "It's a garbage pod!
    It's a smegging *garbage* pod!"

    Losing religion.

    Confidence and Paranoia

    Astronaut fever
    Made charisma come alive
    And murder self-doubt.
     
  8. Callisto252

    Callisto252 Supply Officer

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    Well mine aren't particularly poetic, but anyway...

    Demons and Angels
    Triplicator fail
    Two Red Dwarfs, one good, one bad
    Yikes, evil smeggers!!

    Quarantine
    Arn gets holo-plague
    Goes Flibble-ing doolally
    Till rescued by luck

    Holoship
    A ship made of light
    Rimmer attains Nirvana(h)
    And learns how to love

    25 years since series V today! (and a quarter of a century of loving the small rouge one for me :-) )
     
  9. HO HO HO I'M JMC

    HO HO HO I'M JMC Deck Sergeant

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    MeĀ²

    A self-loathing man
    Coming face-to-face with his
    Own worst enemy.
     
  10. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Back to Reality

    Game over, Dwarfers,
    Go back to reality,
    But is it true life?
     
  11. HO HO HO I'M JMC

    HO HO HO I'M JMC Deck Sergeant

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    Kryten

    Do androids dream of
    Electric sheets, or rebels
    With CPU cores?
     
  12. Wenceslas

    Wenceslas Deck Sergeant

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    Behind you
    Entangled
    Moon with life signs.
    Tragical game.
    But problems just starts...
     
  13. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    The Last Day

    Silicon heaven,
    Where all calculators go,
    Hudzen loses faith.
     
  14. Santa Paws

    Santa Paws Flight Co-Ordinator

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    On gawd, I'm useless at haikus... :shock:
     
  15. Wenceslas

    Wenceslas Deck Sergeant

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    Behind you
    Back to Earth

    Russian girl created portal.
    It takes us back to Earth,
    but we aren't real...
     
  16. Strat-tastic

    Strat-tastic Flight Co-Ordinator

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    Never mind, so is Asclepius ;-)

    But he makes good efforts :-)
     
  17. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Give & Take
    Derelict station
    A time-travel paradox
    Whose kidney was it?
     
  18. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Officer Rimmer
    Synthetic captain
    Rimmer clones himself again
    Will he ever learn?
     
  19. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Psirens
    Lister thinks he is
    Kissing Pete Tranter's sister
    But it's a Psiren
     
  20. Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century

    Deep_Space_in_the_15th_Century Supply Officer

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    Deep Space in the 15th Century
    Out of Time
    Found a time-machine
    But it's not a space-machine
    Renaissance deep-space

    Tikka to Ride
    It's a space-drive now
    Set to Dallas '63
    Didn't they check it?

    Entangled
    Those rods from Trojan
    Crop up again in this one
    Haven't seen them since

    Lemons
    Back-to-Earth machine
    Rejuvination shower
    Stick it on the pile

    Marooned
    Lister and Rimmer
    Trapped in a room together
    Just like the old days

    Terrorform
    Inside Rimmer's mind
    His neuroses come to life
    Tell him you love him

    Balance of Power
    Holo-Kochanski
    Has "A woman's period"
    It's Rimmer in there!

    Dear Dave
    A post-pod arrives
    Lister's ex-girlfriend Hayley
    Pregnant in the past

    Fathers & Suns
    Father's Day in space
    Lister gives himself a card
    Since he's his own dad
     

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