Who Would Like To Be In Space With?

Discussion in 'RED DWARF UNIVERSE' started by 2x4b523q, Apr 17, 2009.

  1. 2x4b523q

    2x4b523q Second Technician

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    Hi guys, this is my first New Topic.

    I hope to be going to a convention in July or Dimension Jump XV, and I will try and ask Craig Charles: "If you could be trapped in space with the hologram of anybody, who would it be?". So, let me hear your ideas, Dwarfers...
     
  2. Tex_Rimmer

    Tex_Rimmer First Technician

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    Craig: "You could ask about me career! Or me life! Or me work on Coronation Street! Or even ask for dirt on the other members of the cast! But no, all you want is to ask me some smegging Barbara Walters type question! Smeg, why don't you ask me what kind of smegging tree I'd like to be next?"


    I'm saying it's kind of a silly question. If I see you there, don't stand too close to me, man.

    But here's a good question you can ask him. If a train leaves London, going north at 50 mph, and another train leaves Glasgow an hour later, going south at 60 mph... No, never mind. He's probably heard that one.

    Wait, I've got it. Ask him why birds fly south for the winter. When he says he doesn't know, tell him it's because it's too far to walk! That's a great line for conventions. Absolutely guaranteed. Even better than the Wormdo line.
     
  3. Tex_Rimmer

    Tex_Rimmer First Technician

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    I'm being goofy, but I'm making a serious point here. A lot of people get giddy and make fools of themselves the first time they meet a star. It's especially risky at a convention, where you might end up on a clip reel or something. Remember the kid immortalized in the smegups for asking that weird question about whether Holly had recovered from her computer rashes, and everyone laughing, because Craig was totally baffled by the question? Don't end up like that.

    Here's a story. Absolutely true. Happened to a friend of mine while I was sitting right next to him. It was at a Star Trek convention in 1988. The 2nd season of Next Generation was delayed by the writer's strike, and Marina "Counsellor Troi" Sirtis (yes, the one with the big cleavage) was up in the front of a fairly small room answering questions about what changes might be made in the show when it came back. Somebody asked if the perennially unpopular Wesley Crusher would be back for Season 2. She said yes. My friend Mark, who was always too expressive for his own good (he was a hyper-active gameshow-contestant-type personality. In fact, years later, he actually did appear as a contestant on Wheel of Fortune, which was a match made in heaven, I can tell you). Anyway, Mark groaned AUDIBLY when she said this. It was a small room, so she heard it and so did everyone else. Show biz camaraderie being what it, and the cast feeling they should stick together, she turned on him and asked him directly "What's wrong with that?" Mark, not knowing when to shut up, said "Because I can't STAND him!" She replied nonchalantly "That's too bad, because he always speaks very highly of you." The whole room started laughing. At him. And I was right next to him. I could have died. Or killed him and then died. To this day I don't know how I did neither. If it had happened on film, I probably would have.

    Word to the Wise: When you meet somebody famous, Don't Pull a Mark. These guys are performers. And, in the case of Red Dwarf, comedians. If you do something silly, they may wring a laugh out of it, at your expense.
     
  4. brautigan

    brautigan Third Technician

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    You ask him what you want...that's the point of Q&A and who cares if people laugh...don't let other people patronize you...:-D
     
  5. Smegbot

    Smegbot Second Technician

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    I've met Craig twice, he's a really down to earth kinda guy. I asked him if he remembered the red dwarf rap "i didn't come here looking for trouble.." he rapped it in full. What a guy. lol
     
  6. Tex_Rimmer

    Tex_Rimmer First Technician

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    If a star patronizes you, you can't do much about it, since they have the audience behind them.

    As for this particular question, it seems a hard one to answer. If he doesn't want to end up sleeping on the couch, he's pretty much got to name his wife Jackie. And if he gives the answers he might want to give, like Jennifer Aniston or somebody like that, it would be time for Mr. Frying Pan to make a short, sharp trip to Head Land.

    Maybe a safer question to ask would be what character from another science fiction show would he like to have been the ship's hologram on Red Dwarf. It might be interesting to see whether he'd pick, say, Lieutenant Uhura, or Princess Leia, and might give him an opening to make a joke out of it (like by asking "Is Baywatch science fiction?").
     

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